Buzz, Demand and Sales

Sigh. How I’d love to post a super-upbeat-über-happy message, but my frustrating day has dampened my spirits.

I’ve said a lot of this before, but I’ve got a few new readers now, and they may not know some of this.

First of all, I do want to thank my street team, vocal fans and new readers. Because of you, yes, Emi Lost & Found is getting some attention. It’s wonderful to see the readers chime in on polls or opinion questions, and it’s flattering to receive messages from emotional fans as they make their way through the series. Your devotion to the books (and to me) means so much.

That being said, buzz doesn’t equal sales. I’d hoped it would, but this time around, it doesn’t. I don’t feel like I have that many readers in comparison to most (my sales ranking and reviews would attest to that), but maybe the market – my market – is already saturated with my books… or maybe people are reading them without buying them, I don’t know. Whatever the reason, I will not be able to quit my day job on my birthday like I’d hoped. I’m not dwelling on it anymore. It is what it is.

But, yes, I have a day job. I work for a company, overseeing the service desk that helps our employees with their computers and tablets and phones. I work 8-5 Monday through Friday, and I have to be ‘on-call’ every other week to answer questions from our agents after hours. (Fortunately, we don’t get many calls.) My immediate manager left last month, and one of my co-supervisors left a few months before. My team-size more than doubled, as did my workload. I’m stressed most of the time. On top of that, we don’t have the best vacation policy, so I have to save days for sick time.

I’ve gotten a lot of requests from readers to go to various signings across the country, and I’ve committed to two in 2014: one in Cleveland in April, and another in St. Louis in September. I’m really looking forward to both, and I hope to meet some new readers in both cities. Both of these trips are already straining my budget and my vacation time… so any more won’t be added to the schedule unless something significant changes with sales.

I’m also getting a lot of questions about when the next book will come out… and honestly, I don’t know. The first draft of OLIVIA was finished more than a year ago, but I’m not happy with a lot of it. With my job and all of the after-hours promoting I have to do, I’m finding it very difficult to get into the heads of my characters. Editing Olivia is daunting to me now, and every day I don’t work on it, I feel further removed from the character and her story. It breaks my heart. It depresses me. It’s a vicious cycle.

Anyway. I don’t mind when y’all ask questions, but I’m tired of saying ‘no’ and ‘I don’t know’ because I feel like I’m letting everyone down. I’m already letting myself down, so forgive me if I don’t answer.

More than anything, I want to write. Second to that, I want to go out and meet the people who’ve touched MY life by reading my books. Right now, though, there seem to be a lot of barriers that seem insurmountable to me. I’m trying my best, though. I promise I am.

Please be patient with me… and thank you so much for reading. 🙂

P.S. I’m hoping dinner with my friends will cheer me up a bit. Maybe I’m just having a really bad day.

4 thoughts on “Buzz, Demand and Sales

  1. I’m feeling like your mother when I say I would do anything to make this work out differently for you. This journey is a long one but it has purpose. While we may not undertand it, in time we will. I know your stalkery fan base has grown tremendously!! It will only continue to do so. I see all the enthusiasm our groups have brought to so many, and we are all truly having a fun time with this. Do you realize the volume of people you have brought together because of your writing? Perfect strangers and now best of friends. You keep reaching out to us for support, guidance or an on-line bitch fest if that’s what you need. That’s what we are for. No matter what we will always be here for you. You have touched our lives in such a way that we are stuck together like glue and paper!! Perhaps your creative passion with writing needed to take a detour. Perhaps writing “7” and Jackson and now Jon’s POV is what you are supposed to be doing. Perhaps Olivia is meant for a different time down the road. I can’t believe I just said that. I’ll regret that later!! This crazy journey of life is unpredictable but it’s always so much better with people we love and enjoy. Thank you Poppet. We are blessed with you in our lives!!!

  2. Sweetie, do not despair! Olivia will we released when you are pleased with her journey and when you are ready! We’ll keep plugging along for you and know that BETTER things are coming up for you!!! Sending you lots and lots of ((((HUGS)))

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